What are we going to DO about it?

Why is it so hard for me to wake up and get out of bed in the morning? Everyday, it happens; and I have no clue why. I need to change my schedule, I need to do not so fun things first, and then when they’re all done, I can relax or enjoy doing fun things and not having to worry about getting other thing done. I need to change. I so want to change. It just drives me crazy. I also want this pencil to make scratchy noise, but it isn’t, so I keep writing ‘til it does. But what’s the point of that? It’s this weird feeling and love and addiction I think I have. I don’t know why I have these weird things in my life. But I guess it’s better to ask what can I do to replace these than to figure out why. Sometimes in life, actually often times we spend more time and energy on why something has or has not happened or whatever. I don’t think that’s the point of life: to figure out WHY of everything. We just need to accept what happens and decide what to do from there. What are we going to DO about it?
And a lot of times you won’t ever figure out why, so just accept the fact that you don’t know everything, that God has His reasons, just like we do; and though there is a reason to everything, perhaps we wouldn’t understand it, even if God did tell us.
Why do we not trust God that things will work out? It’s almost like we think we know more than God by asking why, and not putting our faith in Him and letting Him guide us to Him. How awesome is that! God sends us down to earth to prepare us to meet and return home to God. He also will tell you all that you need to do to accomplish that.
It's like getting directions from the person you're trying to get to, but not only that, they're right there; all you have to do is call them and ask for help, and they'll tell you just what you need to do. But you have to remember that even though He is always there for you, He will not to everything for you, what I mean is, He will not tell you all things to do. Such as which brand of carrots to buy, or what pair of shoes to wear to a date, or whether you should read a book or call a friend. You do have agency so use it!
But then again, don't act like you know more than God because you don't. It's like sometimes we think we know more than God, our creator does. He know everything about everything; we know a lot of things, but defintely not everything. Why do we always do this? Why don't we just do what the Lord tells/asks us to do and that's it? There I go again asking why. I want to do what the Lord asks and tells me to do it; it would be a lot simplier than trying to figure out what the world wants of me because it changes all the time! I've got to stop hanging out so much in the world, but dive into living water and drink it up and never thirst again.
How can I change myself? How can I break these worldly, natural man habits? I want to be able to control my whole self some day, self-mastery, and it's got to start today. What can I do today that will help me get there? Perhaps getting my priorites right/straight, whatever, it needs to stop. So instead of being on the computer for three hours when I first get home from work, I should do the things that need to be done, fill the rest of your time with pebbles and life will be good.

This has been
S.T. Harriot